Why Your Mom Doesn’t Call You


As we grow older, we get busier. As a consequence of lack of communication, the relationship between children and their parents can deteriorate. Usually, when children grow up to become adults, they often put a pause to exchanging meaningful conversation with their parents. The same could apply to parents, and that may be why your mom doesn’t call you.  

To maintain a strong relationship with your parents, you should strive to have healthy communication with them. It’s easy to get caught up in the hustle-bustle of life and forget to catch up with your parents. In fact, at first, you may not even notice that your mom isn’t calling you. 

Many people assume their mothers aren’t calling because they don’t want to talk or are too busy. However, it could also be something else. As you’re an adult and you have a life of your own, your mom might stop herself from calling you because she thinks you may be busy.

If you’re curious about why your mom doesn’t call you and want to change this pattern of communication, keep on reading.

Reasons Why Your Mom Doesn’t Call You

There may be two key reasons why your mom doesn’t call you.

1. She Thinks You Are Busy

Your mom thinks you’re busy getting your life together or burning the midnight oil to build a career for yourself. Hence, she’s trying to avoid bothering you.

If you really want to talk to her, make sure you make time for her and frequently call her. Doing so will restore her confidence, and she will start calling you more herself.

2. She Thinks You Don’t Want To Talk

Even if your mom is free and wants to talk, she thinks you might be doing something more important than talking to her. Hence, she might believe that she’s not a priority to you and may be discouraged from calling you.

When parents get older, they may think we don’t have time for them. Even if they feel lonely, they may not call us to not disturb us.

Hence, if you feel that your relationship with your mother is sporadic, it is never too late to start talking more often. Try talking to her a bit more than you usually do. You’ll see how a little effort goes a long way for your relationship.

What Can You Do If Your Mom’s Not Calling?

If you’re worried about your mom not calling and wish to talk to her more often, here are a few easy ways you can start doing so.

Choose An Ideal Time To Talk

Would you like to talk to your mother while there’s an array of noises in the background? No one can have a meaningful conversation that way. To avoid an awkward call, choose a time when you and your mother are both free to have an uninterrupted conversation.

Do Not Argue

The key to any good conversation is a friendly tone. Even if you disagree with your mother, sometimes try to stay respectful when you’re on a call. We know sometimes it can be hard for people to control their emotions but try to stay calm, no matter what.

Try A Video Call

Aged cheerful female smiling and using contemporary tablet while talking on tablet in living room with green plant

If you want to feel more connected while on a call, try video calling your mom instead of a simple call. This may make the call more relaxed since you’ll be able to see each other as you talk. There are plenty of ways to video call your parents, such as the Ohana app designed with seniors in mind.

Focus On Quality Instead Of Quantity

If you’re calling your mom more often but only engage in small talk, you may not be getting any benefit. Hence, choose to call her when you’re feeling your best. Make sure that you’re in a positive mood and ready for a good conversation.

Even if you’re busy, don’t try to multitask while talking to your mother on the phone. Actively listen to what she has been saying so you can engage in a fruitful conversation. If she is also actively listening to what you are saying, you will feel more comfortable talking about your life.

What If Calling Your Mom Doesn’t Work?

If you have tried calling your mom many times and you both fail to build a healthy relationship with each other, seek out another family member, such as another parent or a sibling. Talking to them about the situation at hand can be of great help for you, and you can apply all the tips mentioned above to them as well.

As an adult, you’re supposed to understand why your mom may not be calling you. However, it is always purely your decision whether or not you wish to reach out. Whatever decision you come to, acting respectfully in every case demonstrates the maturity of a person.

Final Thoughts

Every individual in a family has their strengths, struggles, and opinions. While a family is a unit, it’s easy for each person to get caught up in their lives and neglect familiar relationships. If you’ve been distant for a while, your mom may not call you because she doesn’t want to disturb you or she thinks you don’t want to talk.

If this isn’t the case, though, you may want to reach out to her and fix this before the communication gap widens. Call her to tell her that you miss talking to her or just catch up on life. One small phone call could do more for you than you think.